Monday, July 21, 2014

A letter to my sons

Dear Sawyer and Graham,

Just a few more days until we welcome your little sister.  And I'm sure it's no surprise to you that your momma is a little emotional about it.  Change is hard -- even when you know it is going to be the best thing ever!  There is just something about giving up what you know and what you are comfortable with.  I hope you two will always press on with change and enjoy the process of it in life, letting yourself grow and be stretched from it.  While I know that love only multiplies, I also know that splitting my time between 3 means less time for everyone and that is what is making me sad.  It's silly really, because I know you guys will probably never feel that way and because there is nothing better in life than your brother and sister.  You'll probably have days where you like each other more than me or daddy and that's okay.

I can picture us as a family of 5 with a new baby girl.  I can see you two helping her discover the world and protecting her as she grows up.  I can see you three together in several years running around the back yard playing together.  Much like you two do now, just with a little pig tailed girl following 2 steps behind you both.  I can see you both helping her learn to hit a baseball and cheering her on at her dance recital, or swim meet, or whatever hobby she wants to pursue.  And I know she'll be doing the same for you two.  I know she will be crazy about both of you, it's hard not to be!  And being each other's biggest fan is what family is all about!

Sawyer, at almost 4.5 years old, you are smart, sensitive, playful, thoughtful and so many other wonderful things.  You are already the best big brother and it is a role you take seriously.  You are always helping Graham....put his shoes on, use the potty, find his toys.  You are happy to help and I know you will love to help take care of your little sister.  You are the perfect leader for your brother and sister.  God made you specifically to be the first of our babies.  He knew you were exactly what we all needed.  Thank you for your patience and forgiveness as Daddy and I are still figuring out this parenting thing and you are the one we are learning with.  You are my very favorite first born son!

Graham, at almost 3 years old, you are silly, determined, love to make people laugh, our snuggler and know exactly what you want.  You are such a perfect little brother for us and our family.  You are so joyful and I know these qualities and more are those that are going to make you a great big brother.  You are already talking about all the ways you are going to help take care of you little sister and you are really excited about a baby and being a big brother like Sawyer.  It will be such a privilege to watch you take on your new role and one of the things I'm most looking forward too.  God made you specifically to be our second baby.  He knew exactly what our family of 3 needed and you were created just for us.  That gives me great comfort on some of our more challenging days.  We were made for each other!  You are my very favorite second born son!

My specific prayer is that we all transition smoothly and fall into our roles within our family of five.  That while a new baby may mean less time, it will mostly just mean more love, more laughs, more fun, another best friend and only great, great things!

You two will always have your very own special corner of my heart for your whole life!  You are mine and I am yours!

I love you both more than you will ever, ever know!

Mommy